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Power & Control

  • “I have mental health issues or a personality disorder — ex. I’m bipolar, I have PTSD

  • “I grew up in a violent home where I experienced or witnessed abusers

  • Its Your fault 

  • You made me do it

  • “She doesn’t know when to shut up,” “She’s always got something to say,”

  • “She’s just so stupid,” “She was acting like a slut,” and adversely,

  • “She wasn’t being sexual enough,” and “She insulted my mother.”

Characteristics of Abusers

  • If the person you love or live with does these things, it’s time to get help:

  • Keeps track of what you are doing all the time and criticizes you for little things.

  • Constantly accuses you of being unfaithful.

  • Prevents or discourages you from seeing friends or family, or going to work or school.

  • Gets angry when drinking alcohol or using drugs.

  • Controls all the money you spend.

  • Humiliates you in front of others.

  • Destroys your property or things that you care about.

  • Threatens to hurt you or the children or pets, or does cause hurt (by hitting, punching, slapping, kicking, or biting).

  • Uses or threatens to use a weapon against you.

  • Forces you to have sex against your will.

  • Blames you for his/her violent outbursts.